So true. So Sad.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
The "special" napkins
My mother taught me to read when I was four years old. One day, I was in the bathroom and noticed one of the cabinet doors was ajar. I read the box in the cabinet. I then asked my mother why she was keeping ''napkins' in the bathroom.
Didn't they belong in the kitchen? Not wanting to burden me with unnecessary facts, she told me that those were for 'special occasions'. Now fast forward a few months....
It's Thanksgiving Day, and my folks are leaving to pick up my uncle and his wife for dinner. Mom had assignments for all of us while they were gone. Mine was to set the table. When they returned, my uncle came in first and immediately burst into laughter. Next came his wife who gasped, then began giggling. Next came my father, who roared with laughter. Then came Mom, who almost died of embarrassment when she saw each place setting on the table with a 'special occasion' Kotex napkin at each plate, with the fork carefully arranged on top. I had even tucked the little tail in so they didn't hang off the edge!!
My mother asked me why I used these and, of course, my response sent the other adults into further fits of laughter. "But, Mom, you said they were for special occasions!!!"
Didn't they belong in the kitchen? Not wanting to burden me with unnecessary facts, she told me that those were for 'special occasions'. Now fast forward a few months....
It's Thanksgiving Day, and my folks are leaving to pick up my uncle and his wife for dinner. Mom had assignments for all of us while they were gone. Mine was to set the table. When they returned, my uncle came in first and immediately burst into laughter. Next came his wife who gasped, then began giggling. Next came my father, who roared with laughter. Then came Mom, who almost died of embarrassment when she saw each place setting on the table with a 'special occasion' Kotex napkin at each plate, with the fork carefully arranged on top. I had even tucked the little tail in so they didn't hang off the edge!!
My mother asked me why I used these and, of course, my response sent the other adults into further fits of laughter. "But, Mom, you said they were for special occasions!!!"
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
AC/DC Excel Music Video
Yes, *that* Excel, the one from Microsoft. It's an ASCII music video. I think all I can say is ... WOW.
Obama Videos
Two videos for your edification: one a little scary and the other one pretty funny.
Homemade music videos...if his brother is in Iraq, he must be the oldest guy there! Sometimes I do wonder if the internet is a good thing....
This hockey mom does not like Palin. But she has a lot to say to fit into the music. Love the moosehead pianist.
Homemade music videos...if his brother is in Iraq, he must be the oldest guy there! Sometimes I do wonder if the internet is a good thing....
This hockey mom does not like Palin. But she has a lot to say to fit into the music. Love the moosehead pianist.
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Old Ameriquest Commercial
This was recently sent my way, and I forgot how much I had enjoyed it then. Misunderstandings can be pretty funny!
Friday, October 31, 2008
2008 Submarine Racing Champions
Here are pictures of the top three winners of the 2008 Submarine Races!
What did you expect to see?
Thanks, Linda!
Friday, October 24, 2008
Puns for Friday
These are so bad, I should save them for Sunday and call it Punday. But I just enjoyed them too much to wait. #10 and #17 are my favorites. Happy Friday!
1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a-head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium, at large.
20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes in-verse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a-head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium, at large.
20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes in-verse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Election to be decided by new demographic data
There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. I love the "underemployed mathematician" and "Dinty-Moore Dads". Wonder if we'll see these categories on the 2010 Census?
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Drunken Pumpkins
There's a great summer recipe involving vodka and punching a hole in a fruit to create a "drunken watermelon". Looks like beer and pumpkins don't mix as well.
The last pumpkin looks a little, well, seedy.
Thanks for sending this in, Linda!
The last pumpkin looks a little, well, seedy.
Thanks for sending this in, Linda!
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